Complexity 101
- MyPolar
- Oct 23, 2018
- 3 min read
“When you’re interested in something, you do it only when it’s convenient.
When you’re committed to something, you accept no excuses, only results.” (Herm Edwards)
Weather: sunny, clear skies, mild
Mood: optimistic, positive, eager, determined
Personal Biography
Behind the vision & mission of MyPolar lies a multidimensional, complex individual with many identities. As an introduction, I identify with the following:
· African-American (biracial)
· Gay
· Low-income (socioeconomic status)
· Male
Unlike other currently existing blogs I’ve encountered, I also believe my age (29) and marital status (single), highlights the unique, cumulative perspective behind MyPolar. While I’ll save my childhood and upbringing for a future discussion, I am a proud alum of the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill (studied history & social entrepreneurship) and gracious alum of Teach for America (San Antonio corps-elementary education).
Bipolar Diagnosis
Like so many others diagnosed with mental health conditions, it was at the age of 25 where prominent symptoms and elements of bipolar appeared for me personally. While teaching (my beloved profession where I thrived), I exhibited extreme mood fluctuations, detrimental living habits (prolonged periods of no sleep, weight loss), and severe life impairment. It wasn’t until I didn’t show up for work 3-5 consecutive days unannounced, that I was released from my position; though devastating and painful, this occurrence paved the way for me to relocate back home & receive the professional help I so desperately needed. Ultimately, I was diagnosed with bipolar II disorder, ADHD, generalized anxiety disorder, and depression.
Ongoing Major Depressive Episode
Yes, receiving my diagnosis + subsequent professional support and medications greatly subsided the frequent & extreme mood fluctuations I was experiencing; however, I unknowingly entered a 2.5 year stretch of an ongoing major depressive episode. This never ending cycle of apathy, loneliness, despair, and turmoil was exasperated by several unfortunate additions: the loss of my mother, criminal setbacks, family relocation, and the divorce of my dad-stepmom. Where I once was full of optimism, enthusiasm, activity, and value, the daily struggle to just survive and stay afloat greatly hindered my overall existence. During this time, I endured suicidal thoughts + attempts, hospitalization, jail, and overall a complete loss of self.
Complexity Blog Overview
Fortunately, as a result of this website, blog, and specific post, there is always hope for things to improve and the negativity to subside. The primary reason behind this space is my personal hope to meet, interact, & engage with other individuals living with bipolar. Outside of my family and professional support, I do not delve into discussions re: mental health, stigmas, and the daily experience living with bipolar. Yes, I’m aware of my personal disposition to cope individually and go without much interaction; however, I earnestly want this to change. Publicly proclaiming and owning what I once deemed to be my insecurity and flaw is a huge step; I sincerely hope to join the pre-existing communities out there and become a pivotal resource and accessible compatriot.
The precipice to the MyPolar intent & outlook [believes] life with bipolar will never be simply rectified with one-single solution; regardless if life will forever be unpredictable, conducive to instability, and an effort requiring daily focus + measured responsibility, it can also still be fulfilling, enjoyable, and worthwhile. Moving forward, this blog will be structured in the following manner to comprehensively portray my many dimensions + layers in a meaningful, public manner that I hope resonates with the audience:
Areas Celebrating the Highs
Areas Capturing the Struggles
Areas Void of Mood Rather Informative
“If you wish to succeed, you should use persistence as your good friend, experience as your reference, prudence as your brother, and hope as your sentry.” – Thomas Edison
Before you go!
o Comment Below: I’d love to meet – please introduce yourself below (no personal information, just a brief, description). Also, how do you identify? Want to share your diagnoses?
o Check this out!: Feel free to explore our website or our Infographics page to see more.
o One last thing: if you could subscribe, MyPolar would be so appreciative. We promise to not spam, nor become a nuisance. Hoping to spark a movement championing bipolar, having allies, partners, and a larger community is imperative.
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